06 Oct No One Can Teach You How to Be a Man (Men’s Forum, Oct 2017)
We’ve held our BOND Men’s Forum the first Thursday each month — with new guys attending every meeting. People find us by coming across Jesse Lee Peterson’s YouTube channels (his personal channel as well as BOND: Rebuilding the Man channel, and The Fallen State YouTube channel). Many, both new and old BOND guys, bring their friends as well. A few new guys said they want to learn “how to be a man.”
Jesse realized anew that no man (nor woman) can teach another person how to be a man (or woman).
A couple of new guys brought good questions and sad stories of divorce, losing their children, depression and suicidal thoughts. Some of these guys never knew their fathers; some were distant from them. One man had not seen his son in over 20 years, and lost the desire to see him. Jesse expressed the need children have for their real fathers, their natural fathers.
Although some men know very well how to work and succeed, they still feel something is missing. Other men don’t know how to discipline and behave themselves well enough to keep a job. All men and women need their fathers — to love them, in order to return to God.
You must also forgive your mothers — many times men don’t realize that they resent their mothers. Small annoyances indicate the deeper hatred or resentment you hold toward her. You must go and forgive — apologize for hating, and not expect anything from her. You don’t have a right to be angry toward her for her wrongs, or you will never be your own person.
Similarly, fathers can be weak and never let go of their adult children. Some men never act like adults, but rather like little boys with their wives if they marry, and remain immature because they have the wrong relationship with their parents.
Whether parents are alive or dead, you must forgive them by realizing that you cannot help yourself — nor could they help themselves. Once you forgive, God forgives you and sets you free. Jesus said that we should pray, “Forgive us our debts as we forgive others.” Then your issues drop away and you can live.
Jesse urges men and women to pray — he offers instructions for a silent prayer (also findable on BOND Church page) that he encourages people to practice every morning and night. Seek first the kingdom of God, and his right way, and all else will be added to you. (You should not seek a wife or husband, or anything else — God will add what he wants for you as you seek him.)
Biblical Question of the Week: When you accepted Jesus Christ as your “Lord and Savior,” did you change?