Is It Wrong to Admit You’re a Phony? | Church 5/21/23

Light does not fight with darkness (abortion). Felt angry: Did I really forgive? Is it wrong to admit you’re a phony? Do you have a reason to live? 

||  See links, clips, and notes below. 

Church with Jesse Lee Peterson, Sunday, May 21, 2023 — Jesse opens talking about Johnny Carson’s life trying to get his mother’s love, and never receiving it. There is no love in the world. Anyone with anger is R-worded and insane. In blindness, pro-lifers protest abortion. But light does not fight with darkness. Parents correct children in the wrong way.  //  

One woman felt anxious and lonely in the world this week, asking: Are we supposed to do anything about evil? She felt inwardly angry, and asked: Did I really forgive? She thought: “I sinned.” But it’s not you telling yourself that — you went unconscious. A clue that you’ve drifted from reality: You think about the past or future.  //  

Biblical Question: Is it wrong to admit to yourself that you are a phony? Everyone on earth is a phony. Everything we’re taught is phony. Parents should live it as an example, not teach and traumatize children.  //  

Forgive and forget: Jesse tells the story of a couple whose dog was kidnapped. The husband suffered an inward death, forgave, and forgot, but the wife could not, and continued to suffer.  //  

New Biblical Question (rough wording) — Do you have a reason to live (or for living)? If so, what’s your reason? (A lady breaks down crying in response.)  //  


  • 0:00:00 Pre-church small talk
  • 0:01:31 JLP: Johnny Carson, blame
  • 0:08:36 (the R-word, anger, taking sides)
  • 0:17:33 Feedback: Let them destroy (abortion)
  • 0:23:00 Light does not fight with darkness
  • 0:25:08 Looking for love (agenda: three-letter word)
  • 0:30:04 Pro-lifers, parents correcting children
  • 0:35:10 Anxious and lonely in the world 
  • 0:42:25 JLP: Preparing for heaven is hell (“Christian” rules)
  • 0:45:33 Are we supposed to do anything? 
  • 0:49:08 Feeling inward anger: Did I really forgive? 
  • 0:58:08 It’s not you. “I sinned.” You went unconscious. 
  • 1:08:30 Pro-choice until a seed planted
  • 1:12:25 Clue you’ve drifted: Future or past, get a reaction
  • 1:15:18 Biblical Q: Is it wrong to admit you are a phony?
  • 1:18:45 Traditions/respect should be lived, not taught.
  • 1:29:50 Forgive, but don’t forget? Dog kidnapping story
  • 1:36:40 Unhelpful questions? 
  • 1:38:09 Temptation, thinking things are fine
  • 1:42:39 New BQ: Do you have a reason to live?
  • 1:46:36 Lady breaks down… 
  • 1:52:30 It’s all vain… / Closing


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Church Notes

10:59 AM US PDT — We start streaming just before the top of the hour. 

Opening: Johnny Carson, anger, and the R-word

11:01 JLP opens by talking about seeing a Johnny Carson story (he was married several times) in which he was always trying to get his mother’s love who never gave it. That’s every human being. 

They keep throwing “racist” in there to get people overreacting. (Note: Jesse says there’s literally no world in the earth today… I think he meant love?) 

You can’t blame anybody. You are to blame. If you were to wake up, you could not be controlled. People take sides on issues without knowing the truth! Even those on the side of what’s right weren’t there. 

(11:07) Jesse tells a story in which a person calmed down to make a right decision. Every human being with anger is retarded, Jesse told a gal who chided him for saying it that way. If you have anger, you’re insane. Look how phony your life is, the people you hook up with… 

(The R-word) 

11:08 Is “retardation” a bad word? It’s all because (of anger). 

11:09 Jesse mentions the subway “chokehold” incident in NYC. People are taking sides instead of waiting and seeing. Or if a man is seen grinning at some woman, a wife takes sides from hearing about it. If that’s not retardation… ready to persecute! The spirit of evil doesn’t want you to wait and see. But the Spirit of God does — be still and know God; don’t overreact. 

11:12 Amazing meeting with the ladies. Work on yourself. Stand alone to do it if need be. All thoughts are all lies, all the time. The individual is to blame for his/her cause and effect. You’re to blame for anything that happens in your life. 

An awake person who’s returned to the Father cannot be controlled, and doesn’t try to control others. While you live, God is with us, the Kingdom of Heaven is inside. 

11:15 Jesse jokes about reparations. You can have paradise right here on earth. 

Stop responding to the world. Evil people try hard to get a reaction from you. Drop the anger. 

Feedback: Let them destroy themselves

11:17 A man responds. We don’t have to react. People destroy themselves trying to destroy you. 

11:21 Sean also speaks. 

Light does not fight with darkness

God doesn’t intervene when men are weak. He lets them be weak. We’re the light of the world. The light doesn’t fight with the darkness. Good has nothing in common with darkness. 

“Love” agenda: the three letter word (also: Prayer)

11:25 Jesse speaks with a young lady who’d previously said she broke up with an ex. He looked like he was loving, but he had an agenda: The three-letter word. Lying! 

Prayer, thoughts

(11:27) She answers a question about doing the prayer, having a thought, and letting it go. 

Abortion protests, lack of love from parents

11:29 Jesse comments with a man on abortion protests: It’s all phony. The young man says kids need their butt whupped — but that didn’t solve it perfectly: He did other things, although the behavior changed. Control them without being controlling, without being angry. 

Anxious and lonely in the world this week

11:34 A young lady (Danielle [sp]) forgave, but this week “slipped.” She couldn’t listen to the morning show this week, and had anxiety. She’s lonely, feeling like an alien in the world. What do we do? Jesse could see it all over here that she had a rough week, and knows exactly what she means. 

11:38 Another lady (a wife and mother) can relate. (Jesse calls her husband “mama,” telling him not to speak for her.) 

11:39 Yet another woman says she was judging, realizing everybody’s blind. She pulled back even more from her family, then returned but realized they can’t see. 

11:40 Jesse talks with a 20-year-old young lady, who also was lonely during Covid. But Church changed her perspective on being alone. 

Preparing for heaven is hell. 

11:42 Jesse agrees with her: You will realize you don’t need it. Preparing for heaven is hell. 

Are we supposed to do anything?

11:44 The woman asks: How do we get involved without getting involved with the demons? You run for office not to get glory or money or ego. All egos feel like they should be doing something. The Father will do the work. The Devil wants you to think you need to be doing something else. 

They can’t destroy you because you have nothing in common. The darkness has no power. The mind doesn’t want to accept that there’s nothing you can do. Satan wants you playing God. 

Feeling anger: Did I forgive?

11:48 The woman asks about feeling anger inwardly. Did she really forgive? Doug gives feedback: It’s not you; relax in it. Nick went through the same, and asked why and who was asking the question…?

11:52 Franky wakes up at 2 or 3 AM every night with Satan talking to him about believable things. 

11:53 Another man says Satan offers us another opportunity to hate again. Don’t think of it as a one-and-done thing. 

11:55 Alexis asks if we ask ourselves unhelpful questions that take us further from the truth. 

11:56 Jesse responds to Alexis, saying that sometimes it’s good to ask some questions. 

JLP: It’s not you. “I sinned.” You went unconscious.

11:57 Jesse advises Doniyel (sp) — that’s not you asking yourself that or telling yourself that. The darkness is lying to you. Satan will make you second-guess it by identifying with the feeling. 

The lady feels like she sinned and fell short, having chosen the anger. You’re so wrong, Jesse tells her: You just went unconscious. Satan’s making you play God to keep you in hell with him. She was ready to move to Texas or somewhere. 

Watch that and learn from it. Don’t overreact. Leave a space there. So the light can come in — don’t make a phone call… let the light come in and save you. It will feel like it’s you, but it’s not. It’s only hard because we don’t know not to do anything about it. “I need to be doing something” — that’s a setup from the Devil. We’re dumber than a doorknob. 

Pro-choice until a seed planted

12:08 Lijie says the moments are powerful, to let you not be in an echo chamber, and have our beliefs challenged. It’s hard because we’re trying to do something about it — do the impossible. 

She was pro-choice, but because of a seed planted by another person, she completely shifted. 

12:11 Franky says the evil one gets to you through thoughts, memories, and imagination. 

A clue you’ve drifted away: Thoughts of the future or past

12:12 Jesse points out a clue that you drifted away: It has you thinking about the past or the future. It doesn’t exist. All that really exists is right now. When you become whole, you stop listening to the ideas about the future or the past. Be aware that’s the Devil. Let it pass. Satan brings it to your mind and makes it seem real, to get a reaction from you, so he can control you. 

Biblical Q: Is it wrong to admit to yourself that you’re a phony?

12:15 Jesse asks a man the Biblical Question, as well as the lady Doniyelle (sp). Everybody’s a phony. There are depths that we’re phony. Admit to yourself: You’re a phony. 

Traditions should not be taught, but lived

12:18 Let no man teach you. The Teacher is teaching you. A young man brings up that in the old days, a man tipped his hat to a woman — not shaking her hand. They should not have been taught; they should have been lived. 

(12:22) How do you teach respect? 

(12:25) We shouldn’t long for the old days? You won’t bring back what is gone. 

12:26 Lijie translates: Lead by example. The young man’s parents traumatized him, Jesse points out. He’s affected by the evil people committing crimes. 

Forgive but don’t forget?

12:29 A man asks about the saying: Forgive, but don’t forget. Another retarded thought! 

Dog kidnapping: When you forgive, you forget

12:31 Jesse tells the story from the gym about dog owners. Three black guys drove up to the couple’s home, punched his wife out, and took the dog. It was so painful that it was like a death to the man, the husband. He let that die from him, and he forgave the people who did it. Now he feels nothing about it. His wife, though, has not forgiven, and is going through hell. She can’t sleep at night. She won’t forgive. When you truly forgive, you do forget. 

12:33 A man talks about how nice the virus shutdowns were. 

12:35 Pray without ceasing. Always be aware. One of the greatest sins is to forget. 

Unhelpful questions

12:36 Some questions are unhelpful and dumb. 

Temptations and thinking things are fine

12:37 Ryan talks about being on his high horse at first. It’s a process. Never think that things are fine, Jesse advises. Consciousness doesn’t have to think. There’s no thinking in consciousness — it just is. It’s another temptation from the Devil. Awareness just is. You just live. 

Franky speaks, and Jesse mocks him for talking long. 

New BQ: Do you have a reason to live? What’s your reason?

12:41 Jesse ask a newcomer and others the new Biblical Question (rough wording) — Do you have a reason to live (or for living)? What’s your reason to live? 

12:45 Raymond says his reason is to see the truth within himself, and to know his true Creator. 

Lady’s reason to live: to see and know God. 

12:46 Rachel (sp) agrees with Raymond. It makes her emotional, because she has to let go of a lot more stuff she’s not fully aware of. She had a torch to end her life: Why live? She breaks down… 

12:49 A man says he does not have a reason to live. Franky says he’s going through a crisis like Solomon: All is vexing. 

12:50 Doniyelle (sp) says God has a reason; she shouts out to Hassan’s talent. 

(12:51) Hake answers… 

It’s all vain

12:52 Jesse adds to what Franky said: When you overcome the ego, you’ll see how vain and shallow you are. 

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